T Minus One Week and Counting...

I'm nervous right now for a number of reasons:

(1) my fear of flying has been bothering me already...I have passed the airport I will fly in and out of 6 times now and I'm getting more nervous each time. I'm not a easy person to fly with and I'm thankful that DH is so understanding (or at least he pretends that he does).

(2) my fear of having surgery...I nearly threw up after my first one as I was being wheeled from the Recovery Room to my room and with the second one the nurses on duty forgot about the IV in my arm and I was pumped full of saline much longer than I should have been. I couldn't get my shoes on less than 24 hours after surgery when I tried to leave. I put the shoes on but couldn't lace them at all. Also with the last surgery they refused to give me any medications an hour before I left stronger than a couple of advil. I was screaming nearly the entire way car ride home (roughly 45 minutes).

(3) my fear of hospitals, needles...I was poked and prodded when I was little. The nurse at the hospital couldn't find my vein so I was repeatedly poked and stabbed. While I can't imagine anybody liking IV's and needles, I wished I didn't have to have one in me at all but I understand why it's necessary. The last two surgeries I had, I bruised pretty badly.

(4) although I know that I have made the right decision for doctors, I have this fear of them just because I haven't met them in person yet. I know that they can give me the best possible outcome for surgery, that they will take how ever long it does take to get all of the endometriosis out of me and give me the best possible pain relief that I so deserve.

(5) fear of flying back home again...mostly this time due to the pain after surgery but also for the flight itself.

So if you pray, say some prayers for me that I'll make it through the flight there to Atlanta, Georgia, the bowel prep, having the surgery, and the flight back home. If you don't pray, just send some good thoughts and vibes my way. I can use all the prayers and good thoughts and vibes you are willing to give.